Sunday, September 30

Notes on DC

Welcome to Hell (or Virginia)
the train ride was unevetful as a train ride tends to be these days. no robbers or bums sleeping in a freight car. the food was nukedd by an oddly inefficient attenant with a speech issue. it was relatively quiet, but when you pay a premium i suppose you respect the premium of those arround you (remember this was only business class not the entitled ritz of first class).

the taxi was also as eventful as a taxi actually is in the world. my cabbie kept sleeping while driving. that is always fun, to be riding with a sleeping driver. the seatbest and sheer size of the car gave me some security until we crossed the potomac river. luckily he seemed extra aware of his duty at that point in time.

the hotel...oh, the hotel. my room is literally in the basement and it does not have a safety latch. but it is relatively clean.

later that night....

C.O.S. - written after one very strong jack and coke
wtf?!? why bother to attend a class which is already outdated for me? well because it seems one needs a ridiculous piece of paper to determine what you get to do at work. so for the price of extremem boredom i get out of the office occasionally. sounds like a deal.

so, should i be a d.c. town gay? it is tempting for odd reasons such as my desire to live a life so distant from that of my family. to live enveloped in history is beyond a dream and the variety of possibilities is almost endless...say nothing of the possibility of relationships. ah a city. a life that is counterintuitive that its draw pulls my soul at all angles. but of course, i would not be able to lead the life i would want to at least not until i found a great source of money. in this city money is a necessity.

so careers. (obviously...did you think i was going ot say where to marry rich?) what could i do in d.c.? or, for that matter, boston? well the baby is not going on hold so it would have to be a baby friendly pick and i could not afford to do nonprofit in a city like those. i'd have to do something "sell out" like actually becoming something like a lawyer or something.

relationships in btv. ha. i love the idea of the country life. trully that is my home deep down, but i fear that it would mean solo forever. so two plunges at once? r can i truthfully deal with a possible future of soloness indefinately? answer for me either.

and of course there is the chance that the city would be nothing. all it would do is ruin my soul and make my baby a snob, oh wait, i'll probably make my baby a snob on my own. but a city how would a city influence me poorly? spend thrift times a million. buy, yay, culture infux. yet i get why the city is so tempting to a gay. sheer numbers alone. the breed possibility. unknown possibilities of a life that may only be dreamed because wherever, i will still be me and can only become who i am to a million "buts." how about: "drink more, think less."

oh boy. i am tired. i most certainly stayed out too late as well as walked way too far, but it was good. touring the city and the memorials was terrific. better yet i did it without distraction of the cell phone. i was certainly moved by the vietnam wall and statues. seeing the raw emotion of vets reading names, crying or solemnly standing obsoring was odd. i know that war damage never goes away, but i am so sheilded from it. now i understand it better. i understand the impact, life long sacrifice and the importance of honoring those who served. yes war is bad and yes our country wars too easily; however, the men and women who give themselves to the cause deserve our utmost respect regardless of our differing views.

the service in this hotel restaurant is awful. or at least my server is. as a point of note it should not take 15 minutes for a salad to arrive or 40 minutes for a panini especially when there are 20 people here most of whom sat after me and got their food before me.

the baby stuff has arrived which is very exciting. now, where is the baby? i wonder if the baby is conceived yet of if i am still waiting for an "oops" moment. it is funny to be so uncertain about something so huge. not uncertain due to the decision, but due to the unknown date of arrival. people keep saying that it is my pregnancy - gestation - but that has a definative time period whereas i am basically in the dark. oh well. the furniture is in and that is great. leo will love sleeping on it. maybe he'll get it out of his system so when the baby comes he doesn't go in the crib. yeah, right.

oh man. love mike and jeremy. hate (not really) the party nights with those boys. last night was super fun! jeremy picked me up at the hotel. we went to their house which is a lovely classic bungalow. it is a bit empoty, but that are gay men without children. so we chatted a bit and then went to dinner. great tex mex with huge margaritas. post dinner we started on the bar hops. of course we started at the boring pretentious gay bar full of pretty and successful boys talking about god only knows what. i decided that i needed to be somehwere much more fun, so i pushed for jrs. that was much better. i met a very attractive (read: pudgy, brilliant, handsome and short) greek dude to turned out to be a neurologist. really, a fucking neurologist who probably has the ability to make millions on top of millions of dollars and who prefers boton over d.c. it could well be that he is an actor the boys paid in their effort to get me to leave vermont. yes, there was the recurring "you should leave vermont. you are smart, attractive and young." but, d.d., what would i do in a place like this? be insane.

so, speaking of going insane, here is a list of the bars:
omega, apex, halo and jrs.

two thirty in the morning. yes, i have an exam soon, but does that stop jeremy and me? ha ha ha. no. luckily the closed doors on the bars kept us out.

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